The Secret History of Home Economics

 

The Secret History of Home Economics: How Trailblazing Women Harnessed the Power of Home and Changed the Way We Live by Danielle Dreilinger is the March pick for my New Jersey book club. (It's the week of my daughter's visit so I'm not even sure I'll be able to join in the meeting. Boo!)

Quite fascinating to read this book while I finished listening to Miss Eliza's English Kitchen. It was interesting to compare and contrast what I was hearing about cooking, kitchens, employment opportunities and the like while having both books in my brain. It made me think a lot about the opportunities for women and how limited they were back in Miss Eliza's time and even after.

Even after reading this, I'm still not 100% certain about how they coined the phrase "home economics." Skills were being taught to women that they would be able to use to run an efficient, happy home. But it seems the area of study was mostly a way for girls to study something more rigorous than "girls' topics" and to prepare for pretty substantial careers, some of which had not yet even been created.

It was a bit eye-opening to read about what home economics was like before my time - and after. I was a student at the time when home economics was in its most tumultuous period. Cooking and sewing classes - for girls only - were on their way out. But not quite.

I enjoyed reading the book and hope that I'll get to discuss it. But... and there's a big but. Towards the end of the book, Dreilinger inserted herself into the narrative. That would have been fine... had she done that all along. It was confusing as to why she inserted herself into the present day narrative. It's not like she's a home economist. Or is she? And it made me wonder what was the purpose of her book? Did the purpose of her book change over the time she was writing it? By the time I finished my reading, I felt that I needed the answers to those questions. Her observations about home economics during a pandemic were spot-on, but it made me feel as though some earlier parts of the book should have been re-written.

I also felt that the book jumped around. It wasn't chronological. It didn't focus on one home economist at a time. It didn't focus on one theme at a time. That made some of the narrative confusing to me, trying to place why a home economist was important and during which time period.

All in all, the book gave me a lot to think about. And I love a book that really makes me think.

Miss Eliza's English Kitchen

I absolutely devoured Miss Eliza's English Kitchen: A Novel of Victorian Cookery and Friendship by Annabel Abbs. I'd just finished listening to This Tender Land and needed a new audiobook. Fresh on the heels of The Cookbook Club, I stumbled across Miss Eliza's English Kitchen in the library's audio catalog. It sounded interesting. Borrowed the audio and started listening.

The novel is based on the history of Miss Eliza Acton, credited with authoring the first modern day cookbook which included an ingredients list, precise measurements, and precise instructions. Acton considered herself a poet. When he father went bankcrupt and her next volume of poetry was rejected by her publisher and the publisher suggested she write a cookery book, although she was first insulted, she warmed to the idea and spent the next ten years working on her first book, Modern Cookery for Private Families. All this held true in the novel. But in the fictionalized version, Eliza hired Ann as her skullery maid who eventually became her partner in working on the cookbook.

Because of the employer/servant relationship, both Eliza and Ann kept many secrets from each other. It caused them to misunderstand exactly who the other was, so although they did become close, they never really crossed the threshold into what I would consider real friendship.

Eliza held the secrets of her financial situation and her past. While Ann kept secrets about her family life and present circumstances. The reader knows most of the secrets early on... although the one secret that the author revealed much later was one that I predicted incorrectly for a very long time.

The descriptive language used in the novel made my mouth water at times. It made me want to rush back into my kitchen from my walk and experiment with recipes that I could then share with someone... anyone. (I love thinking about food - and eating food - and creating dishes - but at this point in life, the idea of having to prepare something over and over again until perfection is not my idea of a good time. I don't enjoy the act of cooking enough these days. In my younger years, it would have been a dream!)

The audiobook was read by two different narrators, alternating chapters from both Eliza and Ann's perspective. It was entertaining, informative and delectable and I highly recommend.
 

My Not So Perfect Life

Sophie Kinsella is always good for a light, pleasant read. And My (Not So) Perfect Life did not disappoint. It had themes that held me interest and that I could connect to. There was also a big message to the book which I'm sure you can guess.

Cat Brenner is living her dream of working in branding in London. She's left behind her farm girl self, Katie, with her dad and his farm in Somerset. Even though she's living her dream, life isn't perfect. Her living situation isn't great. Small, cramped quarters with annoying roommates leading to a horrible daily commute only to arrive at work and have to deal with office politics, and... her perfect boss. Cat's boss, Demeter is perfect. On top of being a star at what she does, she looks perfect, her kids and husband are perfect, she goes on perfect vacations, tries out all the latest "in" places before they are open to the public. Her house is perfect. Cat only hopes "to be" Demeter in another 20 years.

Things go wayward at the office and Cat is let go. She returns home to the farm to recover herself and look for a new job. Her dad and stepmom have, since her last visit home, started a glamping resort that Cat had helped get off the ground by shooting off ideas, creating a brochure and a website, an excellent job in branding. At the time of her return, they are ready to greet their first guests. Katie (she's back to Katie now) helps out and is really good at that, too. Although she longs to return to London and to the corporate life.

Things are going well enough until Demeter shows up with her perfect family to enjoy a week at the glamping resort. That's when the story really comes together. What is a perfect life? Both Katie and Demeter have to come to terms with what that means.

Reading this reminded me to the time when my kids were little and we'd spent a lot of time at our community center. We'd be there for pre-school, swim classes and other activities. My kids were normal kids... which means there were ups and downs, most far from perfection. And with three kids, what was the chance they'd all be close to perfect at the same time? Yet there was this "perfect" family at the community center, too, with (only two) kids of similar age to my kids. And they seemed perfect. The kids were always exceptionally behaved, the parents appeared to have a great marriage, the mom had some sort of career (working in a family business, if I'm recalling correctly) that allowed her the perfect balance between family and work. I used to joke all the time with my long distance best buddy about this perfect family. I was always looking for a kink that I couldn't find. Now I'm wondering even more... was their life really as perfect as it seemed? And what are they all up to these days?

The book also makes the distinction between the "perfect lives" people share on social media and the realities that the posters are living. That's always something to contemplate. Who posts the ugly bits of life on social media? Not many.

My older daughter was going through some workplace drama of her own as I was reading My Not So Perfect Life. A lot of what Katie questioned about her own life were things I imagined that my daughter was wondering about as well.

This was a fun, easy-to-read novel. Just what I needed!

The Lincoln Highway

I didn't know much about Amor Towles' The Lincoln Highway other than it was written by the author of A Gentleman in Moscow. And that it was supposedly nothing like A Gentleman in Moscow. 

Biggest difference for me was that unlike the years it took for me to finish reading A Gentleman in Moscow, I whipped through The Lincoln Highway in just a few days. 

The Lincoln Highway is the very engaging tale of Emmett and his younger brother, Billy. Emmett has just been released from a stint at a reform school after his actions accidentally caused the death of another young man. He was released early because of the death of his father. Years earlier, Emmett and Billy's mom had left. The father, not fit for the farming life, had let the farm go into foreclosure before his death. The boys literally had nothing and were ready to make a fresh start. Somewhere else. Emmett dreams of a life flipping houses in Texas. And Billy dreams of finding their mother.

Billy found a stash of postcards from their mother. From those clues, he figures that their mom had set west on The Lincoln Highway, the first transcontinental highway in the United States. He wants to follow The Lincoln Highway and search for her at the fireworks in San Francisco on the 4th of July. She always loved fireworks. Emmett gives in, figuring California has just the growth potential for his house flipping idea to make sense.

Who arrives on the scene but two of Emmett's friends from the reform school. Who have totally different ideas about what the immediate journey should look like. This is the journey the four end up taking. And The Lincoln Highway is the tale of that journey. Taking place over 10 days, it is told from multiple perspectives. From the perspective of each of the four young men, from the perspective of Sally, Emmett and Billy's closest neighbor in Nebraska. And from the perspective of a few others that they meet along the way.

I really enjoyed this novel but I wish I hadn't read it so close to finishing This Tender Land. The stories are nothing alike. But This Tender Land  was also the story of four young people on a journey. The strength of both of these novels is in the storytelling. I couldn't help but comparing the two when in reality there is no comparison.

 

The Cookbook Club

On one of my rare entries into a store this past year, I walked into Barnes & Noble with my daughter while she was attempting to pick up a book. I browsed, picked up The Cookbook Club by Beth Harbison. It must have struck my fancy as I added to my ToBeRead list. After finishing Night and This Tender Land, I was wanting something light to read and this was available from the library.

I had a preconceived notion about what this novel would be like and it was nothing like what I imagined. I expected a novel with a bunch of people in a club where they worked on recipes from a particular cookbook for each month. That part was true. But I also expected the story to somehow be connected to the recipes or the cookbook or  the cookbook author. That wasn't the case at all. 

Beth Harbison clearly has a love of cookbooks. My cookbook collection isn't too shabby either but... when I'm in a need a recipe, I typically head to google and search and print the recipe that most strikes my fancy.

Margo, Aja and Trista are each at a crossroads. Trista has just purchased a bar and has come up with the idea of a cookbook club basically to find like-minded testers for the recipes she hopes to cook and serve at her bar. Margo has just been dumped by her jerk of a husband when she comes across the ad for the cookbook club. Aja is hoping that she can learn how to cook! The three definitely bond over food and this is a wonderful book for foodies. However, the book is more about the women's friendships and the choices that each one makes during a difficult time in her life. Oh... but the food...

If only I wasn't going to be on Weight Watchers for the rest of my life! I'd love a cookbook club! It has given me the idea, though, that if I ever bond with people also following WW, a  WW dinner club might be something fun. Who can make the most delicious healthy food?

One thing that really struck me, though, was what Margo had to go through cooking for her husband. He was truly obsessed with a healthy diet so she wasn't allowed to use butter, real cheese, make fresh pasta, and so on. To think that I think I make things tough on my husband! He can use anything as long as he weighs and measures out what he's using. And he can't use a lot of the foods that I want to limit. I'm nothing like Margo's ex-husband. Although her complaints did give me a window into what my husband might be thinking.

There's also a bit of home improvement stuff in here. As part of Margo's divorce settlement, she's gotten the dilapidated farm house that has been in her husband's  family for years. An old college friend of hers is in need of an escape so in return for free rent, he is doing some renovations for her. I sure hope that future Cookbook Club meetings will be held at Margo's farmhouse.

If you need something light and "a bit cheesy" (pun intended) to read and food is one of your things, you might want to pick this one up.

This Tender Land

William Kent Krueger is a master storyteller. I learned that when I picked up Ordinary Grace last spring. This Tender Land reinforced that in my mind. What a masterful story.

This Tender Land tells the story of four vagabond children: Odie, his older brother, Albert, Native American Moses and little Emmy. The three boys were all residents at the Lincoln Indian Training School in Minnesota. Odie and Albert are the only non-Indian students at the school, taken in by the school after the murder of their father. Their mother had died several years earlier. Moses (which wasn't his real name) came to the school after the murder of his mother at which time his tongue was cut out. Emmy's mother was one of the teachers at the school. Her father had died and she lived with her mother, an exceptionally kind women.

The children at the school were mistreated. I know that the purpose of "Indian schools" was to "civilize" the Indians. But this school sounded more like a prison than a school. Emmy's mother, Mrs. Frost, had suggested that she take in Odie, Albert and Moses so they could leave the school. Then the "tornado god" took something else away from Odie when Mrs. Frost gets killed. Emmy goes to live at the school, with the school's superintendent whom is referred to as "The Black Witch." Odie, Albert, and Moses "kidnap" Emmy and thus starts the adventures of the four vagabonds. 

I feel like my synopsis of the book does it a disservice. This book is wonderful. There have been some comparisons to The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. In a way it reminded me of "The Wizard of Oz" as the four children follow the river to search for what they are missing and to search for home. They meet mean-spirited people making them question why they left the Lincoln School. But they also meet people who only want to help and to restore their faith in humanity and in God. This is all set with the background of the Depression, where most everyone is suffering from hard times.

My New Jersey book club had selected this for their February title. Since they're still meeting on Zoom, I'll get to join in to the discussion. I'm really looking forward to that.

This Tender Land is the first audio book that I've listened to while walking. A few weeks ago, I became determined to find a headset that would be comfortable while walking. I needed something that wouldn't be uncomfortable or pop out of my ears or block out the noise of what might be around me. I bought a pair of Shokz OpenMove headphones. They are perfect! Until recently, I thought I could only enjoy audio books while driving in the car by myself. These headphones allow me to "read" while I'm walking (which also encourages me to walk more). I'm also able to "read" while doing simple housekeeping tasks, something I wasn't able to do when I was trying to listen through my phone's speaker. Now... off to find my next audiobook read.

Ruth and the Green Book

 

I'd finished Night by Elie Wiesel on Thursday morning and I wanted a book to read Thursday night before bedtime, knowing that on Friday afternoon a friend was dropping off a book. I'd have that to read on Friday night.

I got into bed on Thursday night, opened Ruth and the Green Book on my Kindle, prepared to breeze through a picture book. I knew it was a picture book. But ... where were the words? I only saw pictures. Then I realized that I just couldn't see the writing on my black and white Paperwhite Kindle. I decided I'd have to try and read the book on my iPad on Friday morning. Of course, then I needed a book to read for Thursday night so I grabbed The Cookbook Club and started that. The book from my friend can wait.

Friday morning, iPad in hand, I  opened Ruth and the Green Book. I realized that the contrast of the writing against the illustrations made it nearly impossible for these old eyes to read. And maybe there is a way to increase the font of a picture book in the iPad but if there is, I couldn't figure it out. Enough about my trouble reading the book. I bet you want to hear about the book.

I was not impressed with Ruth and the Green Book. In my mind, it was fifth grade content written at a second grade level. When I saw the title of this picture book, I was intrigued. All I knew about the Green Book was what I'd learned after seeing the Academy Award winning "Green Book" in 2018. It would have been something I wished I'd known about when I was teaching fifth grade. I definitely would have taught about it. Victor Green, a postman, created The Negro Motorist Green Book in 1936 as a guidebook for African-American roadtrippers during the days of Jim Crow. It let travelers know where they could eat, sleep, get gas, all sorts of travel-related things in a time when most places would legally be able to deny them service. It was updated annually until shortly after the passage of the Civil Rights Act of 1964. It started out covering just one part of the United States, but by the end of of its run, it covered, all of the US, Canada, Mexico, the Caribbean and Bermuda.

Ruth and her family leave Chicago on a road trip to visit Ruth's grandmother in Alabama. It was after the family's first stop, to gas up and take a restroom break, that Ruth realized something was amiss. She was not allowed to use the restroom at the service station. She learned it was for Whites only. The family spends that night sleeping in their car. They run into a kind person who shows them his Green Book and suggests that if they have to stop for gas, they should stop at an ESSO station. They follow the person's advice, stop for gas at ESSO and purchase a Green Book of their own. It becomes Ruth's job to study the Green Book so the family can know where to stay overnight, and eventually find out where they can get their car repaired when they break down on the road.

This had the potential to be a great story, but as I said, the reading level and the depth of the story was too simplistic for most fifth graders.

Night

I remember wondering why I had never read Elie Wiesel's Night back when one of my kids was assigned this memoir for a social studies (or maybe Hebrew school) class. Said child read the book. I later picked it up and read it. I'm thinking that this was definitely after I heard Elie Wiesel speak at some fundraiser for a Jewish organization. Really, though. How did I hear him speak and not rush home to read the memoir? 

I was surprised when Books and Beer Club selected this as their memoir for memoir month. And I'm anxious to discuss this book with a very diverse group.

I was already an adult when I read Night the first time, but my takeaway from reading it this time feels quite different. What really drew me in this time was the relationship between Elie and his father. And the extreme sadness I felt knowing that all the horror they experienced was at the end of the war, when the concentration camps were so close to being liberated. 

I really do wish I had a record of what stood out to me last time and how I felt after reading the book.

I am grateful that I had the opportunity to hear Elie Wiesel speak. I'm glad that he felt he had a message to give to the rest of the world who hadn't experienced such horrors. As there are fewer and fewer Holocaust survivors still alive, the quality memoirs become even more important. The Holocaust must be taught. The message is still important. We need to pay attention so that nothing like that ever happens again.
 

All Boys Aren't Blue

All Boys Aren't Blue: A Memoir Manifesto by George M. Johnson is about a boy who felt he didn't fit in who become a young man trying to figure out who he really is. I picked it up as part of the Velshi Banned Book Club, not really sure what to expect. 

It's not a book written for me, but I could certainly appreciate the heart and soul he puts into to creating a... hmm... not sure what the word would be. It's not a guide book. But it is a book to offer guidance and comfort to others going through a similar crisis of self that Johnson went through. His story is about a queer Black boy, but it would work for anyone questioning his or her sexuality.

Which I suppose is the reason why this book has been banned. Why this very much needed book has been banned. People, it's not a "how to" book. But I can imagine reading George's story might make a kid questioning where they fit in realize that others have gone through what they've gone through. They are not alone.

Johnson was truly blessed to come from such a loving, accepting family. I was pleased that he knew that. And I wish that for everyone.

I have my DVR set to record Velshi tomorrow morning. I really want to hear what the author has to say.
 

Dear Martin

 

Now I'm on a "banned book" roll. (Even before my husband heard on MSNBC that Ali Velshi was starting a "banned book club." #velshibannedbookclub First book they'll be reading is All Boys Aren't Blue, a memoir by George M. Johnson. Johnson will be a guest on Velshi's show next Saturday morning in the 8 o'clock hour.)

Dear Martin by Nic Stone is another young adult novel that shows up on a lot of banned book lists. The fact that this novel is about what it's  like to be a smart, well-educated, motivated teen with the wrong colored skin should not make it in any way objectionable. How would I have a glimmer of an idea of what it must be like to be a teen of color? If it wasn't for reading, how would I have any real idea? And isn't that why reading novels like Dear Martin is important? So I can learn about the world and life experiences of people outside my little bubble? Isn't this a perfect example of why book banning is stupid?

In Dear Martin, 17-year old Justyce undertakes a project to closely examine the life and writings of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. as a way to better understand how he fits in to what is still a white world. He calls it his Be Like Martin experiment. As he deals with things, being handcuffed and taken in after trying to help his drunk girlfriend get home, extremely racist remarks from the kids he goes to school with, violence on the streets, he journals about them in his Dear Martin journal, wondering What would Martin do?

Justyce is a senior at an elite private school in Atlanta, on his way to Yale. He's one of three people of color in his high school class of 82. He doesn't really fit in at school. Throughout the book, I was so grateful for the character of "Doc," his debate team advisor and teacher of his Societal Evolution class. "Doc" is half black, has a PhD and is a real mentor and role model to Justyce. Everyone needs a trusted adult in his or her life. "Doc" is Justyce's trusted adult at school.

Justyce also doesn't fit in where he comes from. He feels like the white kids at school at trying to knock him down while the kids in his old neighborhood are trying to hold him down by his feet. His mother fears Justyce's interactions in the white world so while she wants the best for him, only sent him to this fancy prep school so that he could get ahead, she cautions him all the time and is totally against his friendship with his debate partner, Sarah-Jane.

Sarah-Jane and her family are interesting characters. I was able to really relate to Sarah-Jane. She is part of a Jewish family. Her great-grandparents immigrated to the United States after narrowly escaping death in a Nazi death camp during the Holocaust. When Justyce tries to explain to his best friend, Manny, or to his mother why SJ "gets him," She's Jewish. It's different... She's not white white. She's Jewish. It's different... he is reminded that she is white. She looks white and You can't see Jewish in her skin color... If it looks white, it's white in this world. This is a conversation that I have with my husband with far too much frequency lately. That he and I would be considered "other" by white supremists, but we look white, we ARE white, so we can slip by. This being "other" while looking like everyone else has afforded us the opportunity to develop a certain kind of empathy that we might not have otherwise developed. We are very privileged, but we know what it's like to be hated or discriminated against because we're part of a group, just because of the luck of who we were born to or where we were born.The same is true with Sarah-Jane and her family. 

Yes, this book contains violence and it contains some "language." But it covers such important material and allows the reader to get a hint of what it might be like to be a young man like Justyce. The kids and who most need to read a novel like Dear Martin are the children of those attempting to ban the book. What are those parents afraid of their children learning?

Forever

 

Over the course of my life, I have read many Judy Blume novels. I was a little too old for her kids' chapter books, but I read many of those as a fifth grade teacher or with my own kids. I read Are You There God, It's Me, Margaret along with one of my fifth graders. What a marvelous  book. (I had a question about the novel and wrote to Judy Blume. She was on a book tour so I heard back from her secretary with a really great email in return. Why didn't I think to print it out and save it?)

But I'd never read Forever. It popped up on a few banned books lists lately. (I still can't believe we are once again dealing with the potential of widespread banning of books. But more on that in another post.) I was able to take it out of the library and read it in a few sittings over the course of 24 hours.

Why is Forever considered objectionable? It's a fairly explicit story of the first sexual experience of a high school senior and her boyfriend who have decided they are in love and that love is forever. 

This novel was first published in 1975 when I would have been a freshman in college. Again, just a little too old to read this kind of story. It might have made sense to me about 3 or 4 years earlier. And perhaps it would have been useful to me 3 or 4 years earlier. Not to encourage me to have sex - one of the supposed reasons this novel is on many banned book lists - but to encourage me to have sex responsibly. Perhaps in the 1970s and 1980s, this might have been considered titillating. I'm not sure. It might have hit close to home to my teenage brain. But titillating? I don't think so.

This novel isn't for everyone. The characters are pretty flat. The dialogue between the teens is extremely stilted. But the storyline is real. Teenage girls being in love after five minutes of casually knowing a guy. Teenage boys  wanting to have sex. Teenage girls not sure if they want to have sex. Teenagers proclaiming they are going to love each other forever. 

Forever is descriptive. But it is not pornographic. It's not a bodice ripper. It's not fantasy. It presents teenage sex in a realistic way. It would definitely be a novel for a youngish girl to read as she's first becoming aware of sex, before she's ready. Just so she has some idea. 

For me, the real richness of the novel are the conversations that Katherine has with her mother and with her grandmother about the possibility of a sexual relationship with her boyfriend, Michael. Those were conversations I never had with my mother - or with anyone. But they were also realistic. In fact, this would be the perfect novel to give to your teenager when the time comes for that conversation, although beats the heck out of me what age that would be now.

Just because a parent doesn't want their child to read a particular book doesn't mean that ONE parent gets to make that decision for ALL families. The idiocy of book banning.

Count the Ways

I'm not even sure how I heard about Count the Ways or what I'd heard about it. But it was available at the library while I was waiting for some of my requests to come through so picked it up. And was hooked.

I haven't read much of Joyce Maynard fan in the past, but Count the Ways really spoke to me. It's the story of a couple who has 3 children, face tragedy, get divorced, face other adversities and keep moving forward. Its story was quite different from my own. Thank goodness I haven't faced the adversity that Eleanor and Cam, our fictional couple, has faced.

This story of family weaves from the 1970s to the present day full of references to what was going on at the time - the draft, the early computer age, the Challenger explosion, the AIDS epidemic, to name a few - and that really struck me as well. I enjoyed the look back in time.

All the characters in this novel are flawed, but in a way that makes them more authentic and more relatable. It is a novel of sadness and of joy. Just like real life. The couple, the kids, the neighbors, the teammates, the babysitter. They were all so real to me.

Kids needing space to become their authentic selves, shared custody, a daughter not speaking to a mother. The way the wives of the softball team connected to each other in the bleachers without really becoming true friends. Best friends. Good neighbors.

The line that screamed to me from the many lines in the novel was Ursula had been Eleanor's easiest child, until she became the hardest. I just loved that line.

The beauty of this novel was the way the story unfolded so I can't share any more than this without giving too much away. If you like family dramas, you should enjoy this one.