Enough Already: Learning to Love the Way I Am Today

 

I was a huge fan of Valerie Bertinelli back in the day when she was on "One Day at a Time" and I am really enjoying her now on "The Kids Baking Championship" on the Food Network now. I'm pretty sure I read her first memoir, Losing It, about 12 years ago, after she'd lost a lot of weight as the Jenny Craig spokesperson. I don't really remember anything about that book, but was curious enough to read this current one.

Bertinelli and I are of similar ages although our life experiences have obviously been quite different. And we've both gained and lost weight and gained and lost weight and gained. (In my case now, lost, too.) And we're both looking at a lot less life ahead of us as opposed to what is behind us. I was interested in finding out how Bertinelli has come to the place where she is today, in her early 60s, being comfortable in her own skin.

This book started so slowly for me and I almost didn't stick with it. There was just too much focus on "losing those last ten pounds" for me. The further along I read, even though she brought that up far more times than I thought might be necessary, I was able to tune that part of her story out and get to the rest of it. Even though she's a celebrity, her first husband was a celebrity, her son is on his way to being a celebrity, other than having the means to live in lovely homes that she is able to completely redo as soon as she gets herself going, her concerns are regular concerns. Those of a daughter, a sister, a wife, a mother, an ex-wife and a friend. I really embraced the passages about her relationship with her mother, mostly at the mother's end of life. And I did not think her horrible at all for stating that the death of Eddie Van Halen, her first husband, was a much more difficult one than the death of her parents. I totally get that.

Pre-pandemic I enjoyed food TV a lot more than I do now. "The Kids Baking Championship" is my favorite show on Food Network. I wish she'd talked a little bit more about that than about her cooking show, "Valerie's Home Cooking," which I've only seen a few times. But her cooking show plays into her acceptance of herself, of her love of food, of the satisfaction she gets from feeding people whereas the kids' show is something more for fun. I read about Sicilian Love Cake while scrolling through something late one night. When she described the cake, I decided that the next time I need to bring a cake somewhere, that's the cake I am going to bring. I quickly copied down the recipe. Her upside-down citrus cake also whet my whistle. Another recipe I copied down. She included several of her favorite recipes which were a bonus.

I'm not sure I can apply some of the life lessons she has learned recently... and I wonder how fully she has embraced them, but there was comfort in reading about the struggles she has, like anyone else, learning to love oneself. I'm not sure if you have to have weight issues to really connect with this book. Even though I thought she overdid it on the "last 10 pounds," I felt sort of connected to her in that regard. She says she doesn't weigh herself (ever? regularly?) but what did I do as soon as I finished the book. My morning routine of teeth, face, and weight. And while I'm not the weight where I'd ideally love to be, I'm happy with the weight I am now, and at least for now, the scale doesn't stress me out at all.